The Cheating Game

"The Cheating Game" is the seventh episode of the first season of Mind Your Language. It was first broadcast on the 10th of February 1978.

Plot
Miss Courtney's office door is open, and she calls Mr. Brown in when she senses him trying to sneak by. She tells him that she suspects one of his students of writing graffiti on the walls of the men's bathroom - specifically, one that says "Miss Courtney is KRAKKERS". She also reminds him that his students have to take the Lower Cambridge exam in a few weeks, and gives him the questions and answers from last year's exam so he can give them a mock exam and see how they perform.

In the classroom, Taro takes a photo of Juan, Su-Lee, Anna, Jamila, Ranjeet and Ali. Danielle arrives with Giovanni and Max soon after, and Taro takes photos of Danielle both alone and with Mr. Brown so she can show her parents what he looks like. Mr. Brown asks all the male students to write the word "crackers" on a piece of paper, but he can't figure out who's responsible for the graffiti because they all spell it K-R-A-K-K-E-R-S. When he examines the students' homework, it turns out that they haven't done well and he gets angry. During the tea break, Giovanni decides that they'll cheat on the mock exam. Mr. Brown, knowing that the course will be cancelled if the students fail, leaves the answers on his desk and tells Giovanni and Max about them when he comes to the canteen. They find the answers and prepare a cheat sheet that they and their classmates use during the mock exam, taking timely bathroom breaks to pass it around.

Once the students have all finished the mock exam, Mr. Brown gives Miss Courtney the answers so she can mark their exams more quickly. She notices that they're not the answers to last year's exam, but to the exam from 2 years ago. Mr. Brown and his students worry that everyone will fail, but when Miss Courtney calls Mr. Brown into her office the following evening, he is just as surprised as she is to learn that everyone answered every question correctly: instead of giving him last year's exam questions, she gave him the questions from 2 years ago.

Quotes
Mr. Brown: Construct a sentence using the word "indisposition".

Max: Sure. Every Saturday I play football and I am being the goaliekeeper because I like playing indisposition.

Ranjeet: Can you be lending me 10p?

Ali: Yes OK.

Ranjeet: A thousand thank yous.

Ali: But I am making one condition.

Ranjeet: What is that?

Ali: I want to hear you say "All Muslims are nice, kind and most wonderful persons."

Ranjeet: If I am saying that you will be lending me 10p?

Ali: If you are saying that I will be giving you 10p.

(Ranjeet says it and Ali gives him the 10p.)

Ranjeet: There's only one thing.

Ali: What please?

Ranjeet: All Sikhs are very big liars.

(Mr. Brown has just corrected Jamila's answer on the feminine of "monkey".)

Ali: Squeeze me please. You're mistaken. I am seeing them in the zoo and there's a very big difference.

Mr. Brown: I am referring to the name itself, not their physical appearance.

Trivia

 * This episode is a build up to the examination.
 * This is the first time Sid is mentioned rather than making an actual appearance.